Monday, August 24, 2009

forgiveness

Forgive: 1:To give up resentment 2: pardon; absolve 3: to grant relief from payment of

In my life I've found that forgiveness can be one of the hardest and most rewarding things you can ever do. When someone hurts you it is hard to turn around and show them kindness by forgiving them. But the more I've thought about it and experienced it myself I realize that forgiveness is more of a gift you give yourself. You can let go of that resentment and move on with your life without harboring any hard feelings or anger. Often times the person you are mad at doesn't even know or care that you are mad so really the only person you are hurting is yourself.
I've also found that one of the toughest forms of forgiveness is forgiving yourself. Most of us are more judgemental and harder on ourselves that anyone else. And even the smallest mistake can be hard to forgive. Growing up I always had a self esteem problem. I used to say things like "I hate myself" and "I suck" and "I'm such a loser" and then I would wonder who or what caused all my pain when I was depressed or sad. The truth was although there may have been instances in my life that reinforced my low self esteem it was my inner thoughts and judgments that kept those feelings so close to me. It wasn't until I decided to forgive myself that I felt a sense of relief and happiness come over me. It was like I was finally letting go and allowing myself to be imperfect. I always felt a need to be perfect... the perfect friend or the perfect child or the perfect student and since I never was perfect I was always disappointed. It's so liberating now to know I'll never be perfect and just accept the person I am.
No matter who hurts you even if you hurt yourself it's important to forgive them so that you can move on. You don't even have to tell them you've forgiven them just be able to let go and understand that everything you live through makes you stronger and teaches you something. So take what you've learned and your new found strength and live a better and happier life.

1 comment:

  1. Forgiveness is very hard, especially if it is repeated in one's life so much. Moving on,well that is even harder for some poeple. Everybody is different, after awile it get's old and you just want that feeling to go away. Happiness is what you make of it, and for some, time is all you got.

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